7:12 - Adam Carolla: This Week in Rage

3. Queen's "We Are the Champions" - The Yankees won the World Series and played this cliche song. Adam pointed out that a.) Freddie didn't seem exactly like a sports fan; b.) the song is ancient now, at 32 years old; c.) and Freddie died of AIDS. Play something else already! 

2. The DC Sniper is finally being put to death next Tuesday - His lawyer arguing that he's too crazy for the death penalty. But isn't that the ideal situation to put someone down? He has no idea what's going on.  Plus it was a whole 7 years ago when that happened. Put him down already!

1. Adam was at a Blog World convention and saw thousands of mommy bloggers, writing about the joys of giving birth. Big f'ing deal - it's like 40 year old guys talking about discovering the joys of masturbation. "Shut up already, bitches!"

7:45 - The Fireflies Song - Psycho Mike's Rock Version
Lots of KROQ listeners are demanding the horrible, super-flimsy Fireflies song. So Dave came up with an idea: have Psycho Mike's band (Murder on the 405) do a serious rock version of it. They played the result. Everyone agreed that though the lyrics were still bad, it was much more tolerable. One of the band member's dad described it as "Judas Priest doing showtunes". Bean felt that if the Owl City version is swine flu, then Psycho Mike's version is the regular flu.

8:25 - Penn Jillette
The taller (and speaking) half of Penn and Teller  talked about the legal nightmare using live guns and ammo in their magic show when touring (especially when performing in the same show as George H.W. Bush in DC); new tricks in their show; and seeing Bono get bopped in the face with a microphone at U2's Vegas concert.  They are doing a brief, rare CA tour in Thousand Oaks tonight and Lancaster tomorrow. 

9:13 - Alex Borstein
The voice of Lois on Family Guy promoted the special episode this Sunday night at 8:30: Family Guy Presents Seth and Alex's Almost Live Comedy Show. Alex told about how Microsoft was excited to sponsor the show...until they actually saw it, were appalled, and backed out.  So it should be fun!

9:28 - Game: U2 Title Fight With Miss Cleo
Miss Cleo recently had a disasturous time giving clues in the Foo Fighter Title Fight game for the song "Time's Like These".  It was so magical that they had her back for this game - this time giving clues for BOTH contestants.  She followed through with more craziness, like thinking vertigo was a color, celebrating New Year's Day on Dec. 31st, and spitting out "you put it up in the clouds" for the phrase "(Bullets) In the Sky".  The boys ended up giving both the contestants the tickets.

Monday: highlights of Sex Rehab with Dr. Drew, people who got into a fight in a movie theater, Spencer Pratt the motivational speaker, and ESPN's Bill Simmons.

6:36 - The Tricked-Out, Motorized La-Z Boy
In Proctor, Minnesota, a guy was arrested for drunk driving. The twist was this: he wasn't driving a car, but a specially made, motorized Laz-Z Boy CHAIR!  Fascinated, the boys called up the city's police chief. He revealed that the drunk guy didn't create the chair himself; that the chair complete with a a lawn mower engine, stereo, headlights, and cup holders; and that the the police department had tried to auction the chair on eBay (bidding was up to $43,000 before the La-Z Boy company made eBay take it down for trademark reasons).   Bean and Kevin wanted to get ahold of dude who originally made it - they want to drive one from LA to Minnesota!

7:09 - Robert Hilburn
The LA Times music critic dropped in to promote his new book Corn Flakes With John Lennon, in which he reminisces about his personal experiences with some of the major artists that he has interviewed. Like Michael Jackson and Bono.  

7:43 - Twilight's Kellan Lutz
The actor who plays Emmett in the Twilight movies talked about New Moon and how he deals with all the crazy Twi-tards.

8:12 - Death Cab for Cutie
Ben and Nick came into the studio and talked about their single for Twilight: New Moon, called "Meet Me on the Equinox". The 2 played an acoustic version of that live, as well as "I'll Follow You Into the Dark".  They were also subjected to Psycho Mike's parody version of that song, called "I'll Follow You When You Fart".  After just the first verse, Ben joked that he need to hear any more of it.  Kevin offered to burn him a CD of it for him to keep.  Death Cab will be playing their song live at Hollywood and Highland with some other bands as part of a Twilight event tomorrow night.

8:55 - Ralph Showbiz Beat
The boys were furious at Harvey Levin.  They heard that TMZ had gotten ahold of the Carrie Prejean masturbation video but DIDN'T share it with them! So in place of the Showbiz beat, they called Harvey up and chastised him mercilessly.  He still refused to send it to them though.

9:16 - Luc Robitaille
The LA King talked about being inducted into the NHL Hall of Fame, the difficulty of making it in the NHL (he was drafted 171st!), how his own kids don't care a whit about hockey, and his inside knowledge of the infamous Marty McSorley stick incident (he heard that someone on the Candadiens had convinced the equipment security guard to look away so they could check out the sticks before that game).  You have a chance to meet Luc yourself at a Hall of Fame charity gala on Dec. 5.


Alex Borstein, U2 tickets, Penn Jillette, Adam carolla, director of Paranormal Activity

7:12 - Shaun White
The snow/skateboarder dropped by to talk about travelling around the world, how mom used to cram the family in a van overnight during ski trips, the upcoming Olympics, and his WII video game World Stage.

7:42 - Bean's in a Rush
Bean has an annoying habit of shortening phrases and names.  Kevin played clips of some of his lamer recent attempts, like "AGT" (for America's Got Talent), "Drac" (for Dracula), "Jig" (for Jigsaw), "the Troub" (for The Troubadour), and "Dez" (for Dezzie). Bean defended himself by claiming he did for casual/friendly reasons - and that he was a busy guy.

8:12 - Game: The Smartest Woman in the World (Not)
For tickets to U2's concert in Anaheim next JUNE, listeners had to guess whether Miss Cleo would be able to correctly answer some geography questions.

8:25 - Listener Call-In: Your Weak Sauce Spank Bank
In the news, a guy in Ohio was caught with stolen X-rays and mammograms. It turns out he was using them at home for masturbation material!! Talk about lame spank material!  Psycho Mike admitted the lamest thing he has used: a pamphlet for a convalescent home (there was a photo of a nurse in it).  

Listeners called in with their depraved stories: a guy used to record bra commercials on his VCR to re-use; a church newsletter (there was a girl in a photo); a human anatomy sketch book; an encyclopedia entry for 'vagina'; instructions for tampons (the diagram!); and, easily the worst of them all - a guy who used a drawing of a naked woman on the wall of a porta-potty!  A GIRL also admitted to using the photos of the hot, semi-naked guys in male underwear package inserts.  Lisa agreed with her.

Oddly, Kevin disappeared after the first segment (and for the rest of the show) without any word.

9:08 - The CBS Employee Helpline
Kevin forgot his company username and password for updating some health insurance stuff.  Oddly, none of his security questions worked either, in recovering them. So he called the CBS Radio employee helpline. Unfortunately, he was just as inept in speaking out his name on the phone and ended up completely (and hilariously) screwed up everything even more.  The system (Ralph) recorded his new name: "Mr. What Comeon", wife named"Sorry", and children named "Uh uh" and "All Right!".  

9:22 - Psycho Mike's "Farts" Song
At KROQ.com, you can hear Psycho Mike's remake of LMFAO's horrible song "Shots". Mike managed to make an even more deplorable song, called "Farts".

7:20 - Chester Bennington and the KROQ Kreep Show
They announced this year's K&B Halloween party today: the KROQ Kreep Show at Social Hollywood this Halloween night.  The twist: Chester Bennington will be playing with his band Dead By Sunrise!

7:35 - Ralph Character: Bill Belichick
The Patriots demolished Tampa Bay yesterday in a game held in London, England, but Coach Belichick is still not happy. 

8:12 - Sal Masekela
The Red Bull Soap Box Derby judge defended the low score he gave the KROQ "Summer of Death" team, citing their embarrassingly lame pre-race skit. Black listener Anel (who played Michael Jackson in the performance) called in to chew out his fellow black man. Sal also talked about running the New York Marathon next week.  You can sponsor him via his mentoring charity at runsalrun.com.

8:40 - Gossip From TMZ
Producer Mike Walters talked about their latest stories: how Balloon Boy's dad organized a rally for his own behalf, Shauna Sand's allegedly-stolen sex tape, and the possibility of a David Letterman security camera sex tape!

9:15 - The Northwest Airlines Pilots
Landing in Minnesota recently, 2 Northwest pilots overshot a runway by 150 MILES. What could they have been doing? Kevin and Bean got ahold of the audio from the plane's flight recorder, and played it.  It turned out they were a gay couple having an argument about their personal relationship.

9:26 - Internet Roundup
Some of the new videos highlighted in the Internet Roundup at KROQ.com:

- The Drunkest Guy Ever
- Kid Tasers Himself
- White MSNBC host Contessa Brewer calls Jesse Jackson "Al Sharpton"
- Seth Green's 1992 commercial advertising the Nerf Slingshot

 

Tomorrow: Flea, and Katie Cassidy from Melrose Place

Today was Olivia Munn's last day co-hosting in Lisa May's place. 

7:28 - Ralph Movie Beat

Paranormal Activity - This isn't opening this weekend, but Ralph saw it, and gave his thoughts about it.  He liked Blair Witch much better. This one had some moments but suffered from bad acting and bad improvising.  He pointed out that there's a reason for written scripts.  He likened it to a community theater version of Poltergeist, and that the scariest part of the movie was watching the actors try to act.

Free Style - Aren't you sick and tired of seeing movies where black people are stereotyped as motocross racers? A clip contained some pretty bad dialogue, so maybe written script isn't always any better...

Good Hair - Chris Rock's light-hearted documentary on African American hair care.  One woman in the movie said she was "addicted to the creamy crack." Bean joked that that was the same title of a VERY different movie he recently saw...

Couples Retreat - Vince Vaughn and Jon Favreau lead a star-studded cast. Ralph saw this and loved it.  He called it a romantic comedy that won't make guys want to kill themselves. 

7:45 - Vince Vaughn

Speaking of Couples Retreat, Vince Vaughn called in to promote his movie.

8:12 - Mark Hoppus
Mark drop by to talk about Blink 182's tour.  To win tickets to tomorrow's concert at the Hollywood Palladium, listeners tried to stump him with Blink 182 trivia in a game called Stump Mark (with a hilariously bad intro song by Psycho Mike impersonating Tom Delonge).  Mark also joined in in a special jam session with the K&B house band 'Melfon', but the crew didn't think he was quite good enough. Ha!

9:14 - Adam Carolla
In the last Showbiz Beat, they were talking about To Catch a Predator.  Adam had some common sense tips for all you pedophiles in avoiding Chris Hanson's traps: 1. If a girl's chat response to any disturbing, filthy thing you say is "Ooh, that makes me hot!", then that's a clear signal it's an undercover agent and NOT a 14 year old girl.  The same if you send her a photo of yourself, and she claims to get all turned on by it; 2.  When meeting a potential victim at her house, send a pizza guy in first. If it's a set-up, then the pizza guy gets tasered. If it's not, then you get a pizza! (Adam prefers to carbo load before a violent dry raping, see.)

This Week in Rage:

3. Parking meter prices - Parking in Hollywood, Adam was shocked to discover that 25 cents only bought him 3 MINUTES!  Can you imagine what his kids will get for a quarter in the future? Do they get negative stuff?  Like a violent dry raping?? (And by his kids, Adam meant Kevin's kids.)

2. People who prefer Mounds bars more than Almond Joy bars -  Mounds bars look and sound like cat turd.  The other bars contain the same chocolate/coconut ingredients, has 'joy' in the name, AND includes a free almond!  What's wrong with the Mounds fans?? 

1. The slow pace of technology - While watching an episode of Sanford and Son, someone mentioned taking 5 hours to fly from NY to LA. That means airplanes have not their increased their speed by ONE mph in 35 YEARS!  Also, Sanford and Son was funny.  Today we have Accidentally on Purpose. We have failed on every level, both technologically AND artistically. 

Monday: David Alan Grier, Penn Badgley, Jessica Stroup, and Harvey Levin
 

Olivia Munn continued to co-host in Lisa May's place today.

7:30 - Listener Call-In: Lame Ways You Got Dumped
Olivia Munn told about how a guy broke up with her over the phone. That's not so bad: a girlfriend once once told Bean she was moving to Colombia - but then he saw her in the mall 3 months later!  Listeners called with their stories.  They involved everything from text messages to claims of amnesia (!) to a note left on a pillow while she slept.  The message was given to one girl via her fiance's DAD!  After visiting his family, one guy was waiting for his girlfriend to pick him up at the airport. She never did. On Valentines Day, a girl told how her boyfriend gave her chocolates with a bear holding a note that simply said, "It's over".  Finally, a girl broke up with a guy right after they had sex (Forgetting Sarah Marshall-style), and then revealed that she'd been sleeping with his landlord for a few months!  To add further insult, the landlord evicted him the next morning.

8:10 - The California Pole Dancing Championships

This sounds like the greatest idea ever, right? Bean and Kevin certainly thought so when they called up the lady who came up with the idea.  But when they found out that NONE of the competitors are actually naked, they quickly turned on her.  If you're still interested (or blind, or gay, as Bean noted), it happens at Green Door in Hollywood tonight. 

8:40 - Anna Torv

The Fringe actress talked about working with Leonard Nimoy, the show's larger emphasis on self-contained stories this season, parallel universes, and more William Bell mysteries revealed in the next episode.

9:14 - Ralph Character: Neiman Marcus' VP on Their Christmas Catalog
Neiman Marcus's annual outrageous Christmas catalog is already out.  Reflecting the recession however, the most expensive item in their catalog this year is 'only' $250,000.   Neiman Marcus' VP called and mentioned some of the items they're going to add: a $17,000 platinum testicle cozy, panda steaks, a $39k magic 8-ball (it's filled with cocaine), a digital camera/pregnancy test (when you pee on it, it shows you a photo of what your baby will look like), and a Kate Gosselin punching bag.

9:27 - Internet Roundup
Some recent additions to their favorite web videos:

- The sexiest version of "My Humps" ever? NOT!
- T-Paining Obama.
- The Ed Hardy Boyz: The Case of the Missing Sick Belt Buckle
- the best/worst Beatles cover ever, Let it Be by an Russian opera singer with a choir
- 4 year-old Rizzo does Her Brooks' passionate speech from Miracle
- Booby Scare - hot actresses do their own breast exam
- Andy Samberg's latest rap video, On the Ground


Tomorrow: Adam Carolla, Mark Hoppus from Blink 182, Movie Beat

7:12 - Listener Call-In: My Monkey Baby
Kevin played highlights from a TLC special called My Monkey Baby, about a woman who owns a monkey.  The freaky part is that she treats it not as a pet, but as if it were a human child. Everyone rooted for the monkey to rip off her face one day. They also asked listeners to call in about their experiences who also had the bad idea of keeping a monkey as a pet.

7:45 - Intern Rapey's Letter to Her Mom About Losing her Virginity
Intern Rapey is a strange girl. Case in point: when she lost her virginity at 18, the first thing she did was to write a letter about it to her mom! The boys questioned why she would do such a bizarre thing.

7:55 - Ralph Showbiz Beat With Olivia Munn
Filling in for the vacationing Lisa May, Olivia Munn joined the crew (a few days late) as a guest co-host for part of the show.

8:30 - Dana White
The UFC President dropped by and talked about Kimbo Slice, the future of UFC and MMA in general, feuds, fighters who get into trouble, and the online availability of fights, among other things.

9:16 - Game: El Rey De Las Peliculas, Star Wars Edition
To win tickets to Symphonic Star Wars, listeners had to listen to Dave say a line of dialogue from one of the Star Wars movies and identify the movie and character he was trying to impersonate.  Dave's bad imitations were gold. 

9:30 - Psycho Mike Character: Manny Ramirez on the Playoffs
Manny is happy to be back in the playoffs, but it turned out he wasn't really sure about when they were actually being played.....or even what baseball was. 

7:12 - Shenae Grimes

The 90210 actress talked about dealing with stardom, her character, and the latest story lines on the show.  Apparently Dawan is in love with her, and they invited him to the studio to see her in person for this interview, but he never responded.  

7:30 - 30 Seconds to Mars
Jared Leto and his bandmates talked about their latest album.

8:12 - Mike Rowe, Host of Dirty Jobs
Mike never seems to run out of fascinating dirty jobs to feature on his Discovery Channel show, and dropped by to talk about this seasons' jobs.

9:13 - Kevin Pollack
The actor/comedian talked about his upcoming movies, his Internet talk show, and his standup show.

Ralph was out today too, in Las Vegas for a wedding.

7:15 - Eliza Dushku
The hot actress talked about the 2nd season premiere of Dollhouse and visting Rome.

7:30 - Adam Carolla

This Week in Rage:

3. Extra-long shoelaces in new athletic shoes - Why are the shoelaces that come with new sneakers so incredibly long?  And the exact opposite for dress shoes??

2. Where are the Wild Things Are - Adam just realized that kids books are lame, only we didn't realize it at 5 years old. He just read this classic one to his kid and was surprised at how much it sucked. A kid gets acts up, gets sent to his room without supper, then gets high and plays with some monsters, and then still gets a treat at the end.  What the hell?? "Horrible book, horribly written. The book blows whale ass!"

1. Charles Manson - Ex-Charles Manson follower Susan Atkins just died.  She was hot back in the day. Clearly Charlie had built himself quite a harem back then - why didn't he just stay home and enjoy that?  Instead of like, you know, making them all go out and kill people? THAT'S how you know he was nuts.

8:15 - Anna Faris
The actress talked about her animated movie, Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs.

8:25 - Ron Artest
Money joined the gang to talk to the newest Laker about his basketball career and his surprising rap career.

9:13 - Lebron James
Money stuck around to talk to Lebron about the documentary about hiim, More Than a Game. 

9:30 - Psycho Mike Character: Federleezee on Celebrity Fit Club
Kevin Federline is fat now.  So fat, he's joining the cast of Celebrity Fit Club!  He called in to debut his latest song,  about he lost his weight and has dropped all his bad habits.  Except for weed, that is.

 

Monday: a recap of the KROQ entry in the LA Redbull Soap Box Derby, and update with TMZ, the writer and producer of Zombieland, the crazy secret life of quiet Intern Rapey, and a guy who wants to destroy all the pandas in the world.